I've felt like I have gone through some tough times through out my life, and for a while felt I was becoming a foreigner even to myself. Just a utter stranger. I really had no sense. No direction. I feel I am back on track.
Work is still work. Still wanting to proceed on with my art. I can't stop I have already started lets hope I do it right. People have to really suffer before they can risk doing what they love.
So strange I have become more of an emotionally involved person. More so then I have ever in my life. You gotta be willing to put yourself out there. The only way to find true happiness is to risk being completely cut open. So it goes....
That saying, about how you always kill the thing you love, well, it works both ways. The reality of it is that its the truth, and the truth is not what people want. The answer to all of this is that there is no answer. Live and let live. There's no time for hate. Just love.
Here are a few of my writings I have done:
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"Not by a long shot!" she said.
"I'm not here to trust"
"I'm not here to love"
"I'm not here to fuck"
"Ideals" she screamed.
"Not real"
"A dream"
So she said.
As she swallowed me whole.
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My wasted days are over.
Ready to be swallowed by the ocean.
Let the tide roll in...
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Captured.
Disaster.
Release.
Collapse.
Repeat.
Cupid's Arrow never hurt so good.
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Something I wrote on July 4th of this year.
Everything started today as your typical mundane bullshit Monday. Its July 4th 2009 and everyone seems to be gitty for fireworks and drunken sex. Always and endless cycle of pointless Holidays. We are the Hallmark nation of Card Companies. This was a day with the means of letting go. I did. Its gone. So it goes....
I don't feel a thing...
So it goes...
